


take me home, where i belong (i got no other place to go)

by 80seidder



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, M/M, Oneshot, Reddie, Richie-centric, Short, this is based off of a song!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-06 03:27:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21219797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/80seidder/pseuds/80seidder
Summary: He couldn't go back. No matter how badly he wanted to go, he couldn’t go. He had disappointed the others enough.





	take me home, where i belong (i got no other place to go)

**Author's Note:**

> this oneshot is based off of the song runaway by AURORA. feel free to listen to it while reading, it'll probably make it more enjoyable!

**I was listening to the ocean**

**I saw a face in the sand**

**But when I picked it up**

**Then it vanished away from my hands, gone**

Richie had been running for a month now. The second he got handed his diploma on the stage at Derry High School, he was gone. He didn’t say goodbye to anyone. He didn’t tie up loose ends, and he surely didn’t tell anyone where he was going. He left for Florida, not caring how many pit stops he made on the way.

He’d like to hope he had helped the others somehow by leaving them before they left him. That was his biggest fear, being abandoned. But this time he had the upper hand. He packed up the few things that were important to him and set off for the east coast. 

He had wanted to leave for so long and he had finally gotten the courage to do it. He wouldn’t miss Derry, he wouldn’t miss the judgmental stares around every corner and the faces people made at him when he walked into a room. 

He wouldn’t miss his parents, most of all. ‘It’s not like they’d care anyways.’ He told himself. He wouldn’t miss the classrooms that felt like cells, shackling him to worksheet after worksheet as he watched himself try less and less. 

Richie took a deep breath and let his body sink into the sand on the coastline of Daytona beach. He had made it to Florida. He thought of Mike, and his brown eyes full of hope, and how badly he wanted to see the sunshine state. 

He would miss the losers. He would miss their smiling faces, their jokes and their presence. He would miss the way Mike always knew what to do when his parents weren’t giving him any attention, He’d miss listening to Ben ramble about Beverly, and about his poems. He’d miss Stanley’s bird book. He imagined himself holding the tan bundle of pages filled to the brim with colorful photos of birds he couldn’t remember the names of. He’d miss Bill’s leadership, and he’d miss smoking with Bev. Laughing with her and gushing about Eddie were some of his fondest memories of the town he used to call home. But, most of all, he’d miss Eddie.

Eddie. The word was a whisper on the tip of his tongue. Eddie was his best friend, his first love. He would always hold a special place in Richie’s heart. He remembered Eddie’s chocolate locks, his pink lips and the way they looked when they curved into a condescending grin when Richie muttered a joke about Eddie’s mother. For a second, Richie thought he saw him in the sand. He reached over to touch the spot, and let the soft golden substance filter through his fingers as he felt a tear slip down his pale skin when he realized it was nothing but his imagination.

He still hadn’t tanned. He almost laughed at himself. Eddie would’ve found that hilarious. He’d spent a full day on the beach, and still hadn’t tanned. 

Eddie would’ve made him wear sunscreen.

Eddie would’ve screamed at him for throwing sand.

Eddie wouldn’t have wanted to get into the water. “It’s filled with all kinds of diseases! People piss in ocean water literally every second!” 

His whole mind kept screaming _ EddieEddieEddie  _ And he couldn’t get it to stop. 

He couldn't go back. No matter how badly he wanted to go, he couldn’t go. He had disappointed the others enough. They were probably enjoying their summer at the quarry, swimming and laughing and basking in the sun. Completely disregarding Richie’s disappearance.

** I had a dream I was seven**

**Climbing my way in a tree**

**I saw a piece of heaven**

**Waiting patient for me**

He wondered if his parents had even noticed when he left. Maggie and Wentworth had been at his graduation, clapping along with all the bright-faced parents smiling at their children as they crossed the imaginary line between childhood and adulthood. Richie had watched the parents of his peers run and hug them, whispering congratulations in their ears and kissing them on the cheek. Maggie just gave him a side hug and gave him a tight smile, muttering something along the lines of needing to go to work. Wentworth patted him on the back, giving him a stern “Nice job, son”, before following Maggie's footsteps and leaving Richie alone in the auditorium. 

‘At least they came.’ Richie told himself. ‘Be grateful they came, Richie.’

They had been there physically, but not emotionally.

Richie had a memory of when he was seven. Before he met Eddie, or any of the others. He remembered climbing the tree in his front yard while his father was drinking and his mother was watching daytime tv. He remembered seeing the golden sun rising over the beautiful green trees. He remembered telling his parents he was going to go see the sun up close in person, all big and round like a saucer. They brushed him off, pushing him away and farther into the shell he had created for himself. 

Richie, now eighteen, watched the sun set over the atlantic ocean and tried to feel content with achieving the dream he’d had since he was a small seven year old boy with a crooked smile and a crooked home life. 

He wondered if he had even actually climbed the tree, or if that was just something his brain had made up to cope with the ugly truth.

He distinctly remembered seeing the sun. Maybe not from the tip top of a tree in a yard that was never his, though. Maybe from the roof of his small home in Derry, tuning out the arguments his parents had, night after night.

**And I was running far away**

**Would I run off the world someday?**

**Nobody knows, nobody knows**

**And I was dancing in the rain**

**I felt alive and I can't complain**

Richie did feel alive, he couldn’t argue with that. Playing volleyball with women on the beach and smoking cigarettes in the shade of umbrellas that didn’t belong to him was fun for a couple of days. He really did enjoy it for a while. But, he couldn’t stop thinking about brown eyes that looked like pools of honey in the sun. He couldn’t stop thinking about hands that held him when he cried, or lips that grazed his jaw when no one was looking. He couldn’t stop thinking about Eddie.

**But now take me home**

**Take me home where I belong**

**I can't take it anymore**

Eddie was always there when he needed someone. Granted, so were the others, but it was different with Eddie. Beverly’s hands may have felt comforting wrapped around his neck when he cried, but when Eddie did it it felt like he was hugging a cloud. It felt almost like euphoria. Being in love with Eddie was the best decision he had ever made. Eddie was his home.

Eddie was home.

Richie needed to go home. 

Derry had never been home, that’s why it had never felt like it. Home had always been Eddie’s loving hugs, or his kisses on the cheek. Home was bird watching with Stan, and racing Bill and Ben on bikes. Home was painting Beverly’s nails while singing along to ABBA, and home was playing chicken with Mike at the quarry.

He needed to go home. 

Riche stood up off of the sand, and wiped it off of his legs. He took one last look at the sunset, bidding adieu to the sunny skies of Florida. 

**I was painting a picture**

**The picture was a painting of you and**

**For a moment I thought you were here**

**But then again, it wasn't true**

Eddie took a deep breath before bursting into tears again, his cheeks red hot from hours of uncontrollable emotions. “Duh-Don’t stress about it too much Eddie.” Bill spoke in an attempt to calm Eddie down. “I’m sure he’ll be buh-back soon. He wouldn’t have just luh-left us, and he definitely wouldn’t have just left you.”

“But he did!” Eddie spoke, choking on his tears. “He left, bill! And it really fucking hurts!” 

“I knuh-know.” Bill took a deep breath before pulling Eddie into a tight hug. “I pruh-promise Eddie. If he isn’t back in a week, we’ll leave and luh-look for him.” 

Eddie nodded solemnly at Bill, before letting go of him and giving him a fake smile. 

“You should go, Billy.” Eddie hiccuped. “Everyone else left a while ago, I know you want to go home.”

Home. 

“Are you sure, Eddie?” Bill looked at Eddie with a worried expression. “I can stay a while longer, make sure you get to sleep okay.” he offered.

“Go on Billy.” Eddie gave Bill a soft smile. He muttered a “Thank you.” in Bill’s direction that sounded more like a “I love you.”

And he did love Bill. Just, not as much as he loved Richie.

He let Bill go, ignoring the growing pain in his chest.

Eddie liked to tell himself that he was okay. That Richie was just a silly unrequited crush he would get over. 

Richie wasn’t coming back.

Richie didn’t care to even tell him about his plans. 

Richie had never even liked him back.

Richie was just flirting for fun.

No matter how many times Beverly brought up the times Richie gushed to here about him, or how many times Stan told him about how Richie used to whisper secrets about how much he liked Eddie in his ear, Eddie refused to acknowledge Richie really liked him in that way.

He was scared of intimacy, and what it meant for their friendship. Looking back on it, he wished he had talked to Richie before he left. Maybe, if he had told Richie about his feelings, he wouldn’t have-

“It’s my fault.” Eddie sobbed, curling into a ball on his bed. “I can’t believe I just let this happen. It’s all my fault-”

“Yeah it is.” Eddie heard a familiar voice come from a small chair in the corner of his bedroom. 

“Ruh-Richie?” Eddie cried, collapsing onto his bed sobbing even more. “I’m so, so sorry!” He reached his arms out towards Richie, begging for him to come closer. “Please, juh-just come hug me. I’m sorry Richie!” 

“You know, Eddie I-” 

And then Richie was gone. 

**And all this time I have been lying**

**Oh, lying in secret to myself**

**I've been putting sorrow on the farthest place**

**On my shelf, da di da**

Richie had been driving for some time now. He avoided stopping like the plague, only taking breaks for gas, and sometimes sleep. If he was lucky, he’d make it home in 14 hours. 

Home.

He could almost smell Eddie, hand sanitizer and sunflowers. He inhaled the scent for a split second before he was snapped out of his trance by the sharp blare of a car horn. 

“Go, fucker!” the mystery person shouted at him. Richie should’ve given him the bird, or atleast a crude look.

But he was too excited to care.

**And I was running far away**

**Would I run off the world someday?**

**Nobody knows, nobody knows**

**And I was dancing in the rain**

**I felt alive and I can't complain**

**But now take me home**

**Take me home where I belong**

**I got no other place to go**

Richie eventually saw the sign. **_Welcome to Derry, Maine _**

He felt his heart fall 100 stories into his stomach. What if they didn’t want him back? What if they laughed in his face? ‘Why bother coming back, Richard?’ They’d say. ‘It’s not like we fuckin’ missed you!’ They’d spit in his face and push him around, calling him all sorts of names. Eddie’d call him a fag, and tell him he never liked him. Ever.

Eddie. Eddie? ‘No, Eddie is home.’ He told himself. ‘The  _ losers _ are home.’

‘They would never say that to me. They missed me. They did. I know it.’

Richie shrugged off the negative feelings like a winter coat, and continued driving down the twisted road, towards home. 

Home. 

**But I kept running**

**For a soft place to fall**

Richie was on Eddie’s street. The street where he grew up. Playing tag with the losers, getting yelled at by Sonia, telling secrets under the cover of a million stars. It was home. 

He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, and parked his car in front of the house that held so many of his childhood memories.

But, it wasn’t home. 

Richie looked into the window on the second floor. The window he had climbed through countless times, to visit one boy. 

To visit home. 

Richie stepped out of the car and stretched, crossing his fingers that the boy would be excited to see him. 

He slowly and carefully stepped onto the creaky front porch, and wiped some beads of sweat off of his forehead. A million thoughts raced through his head. 

‘What if he sends me awya?’

‘What if he didn’t want me to come back?’

‘What if he doesn’t have feelings for m-’ 

His thoughts were cut off as the front door swung open fast as lightning, and Eddie stood in the doorway. He was out of breath, and his cheeks and nose were a dark pink from crying. 

“Richie?” He heard Eddie’s voice before he even processed what was happening. 

“Yeah” He spoke. “It’s me.” He felt his eyes fill with tears and watched Eddie’s do the same.

“I muh-missed you.” He hiccuped, shying away from meeting Eddie’s eyes.

All of the sudden, his chest was engulfed in warmth, and he wrapped his arms around Eddie’s waist. He felt his tears start to fall and he gripped the boy tighter, and whispered 3 words into his ears.

_ “I love you.” _

“I love you too.” He heard Eddie’s small voice speak up. He wasn’t sure if Eddie knew that he he _loved_ him.

But Eddie knew well enough.

**But now take me home**

**Take me home where I belong**

**I got no other place to go**


End file.
